Marriage sucks - Rebuttal

You might think that that our marriage is a little rocky after reading Mirinda's last blog entry, but I am here to tell you that our marriage is the best it has ever been and is always getting better, simply because of one reason, because we work at being married.
And if you have been married for any more than five years or so, you know this and if you have been married longer than that, you defiantly know this and appreciate the work that you and your spouse put into your marriage.
I remember when Mirinda first told me she felt like this, I was a little taken back by it too, but when she explained things to me It made a little sense to me, but I accepted it, because the last thing she said to me at that point was that, "despite all the lousy stuff about me and our marriage, she loved me and accepted it and was willing to work on our marriage.

One of our favorite singer/song writers David Wilcox, put marriage best in his song "Good Together" on his CD "Live: Songs and Stories, when he was telling a story about a single friend who had had several failed relationships. His hapless friend said to Dave, that marriage sounds like a lot of work, to which Dave replied, "Yeah, it is, but it's good work, if you can "get it." I somehow think that Dave just didn't mean get it as in obtain it, I think he also meant to understand it in that marriage is a lot of work too. Which is that just how we see it, because we've got a good marriage and we understand that it take a lot of work to maintain our marriage.

For those of you who are married, I encourage you to thank your spouse for being married and tell them a couple of reasons why you love them and why you appreciate them. It will do you and your marriage good.

Thanks for loving me Mirinda! You are a great wife!
Brian
;-)

Marriage sucks

Marriage sucks! I have always thought the only thing worse than being married, is not being married.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and there is nothing that makes me happier than being a wife. But marriage is hard. It is compromise and cooperation and sacrificing for the greater good. Maybe I was single to long and had too many years when the best date was an evening alone.

My husband is making me crazy. He doesn’t know how to not be employed and I don’t know how to get anything done with him home. You would think with both of us at home we would be able to get twice as much done, but the opposite seems to be true. This is especially frustrating as I work from home and this is my busy time.

The fall conference is coming up and I have a million details to take care of, name tags, sponsors, and one last check with the speakers. Not to mention I have a kitchen full of tomatoes waiting to be canned. Of course there is always the usual vacuum, pick up, mop the floor.

Don’t get me wrong, it is so nice to share my morning coffee with my best friend. Not only is the conversation better then with the cats, but he knows just how I like my toes snuggled. But when snuggle time is over, he doesn’t know what to do with himself and I don’t know where to start.

I think that dating is a horrible way to choose a spouse. What does going to dinner and a movie, or bowling, or the opera have to do with being married? It is easy to find someone you want to have fun with, what is hard is finding someone you want to work with. Finding someone you want to go through the good times with is so much easier than finding someone you want to go through the bad times with. I once read that the decision to spend the rest of your life with someone should rest on one question- is this someone I want next to me when my mother dies? I don’t know if I agree with the specifics but the sentiment is right.

My sister will be getting married soon. Sometimes I get to know these things. After years as a single parent she is finally ready for the love of her life. I know that when the thrill of new love has past, and the arguments over toothpaste brands and hard or soft tacos have been settled, she will know what I do- that marriage sucks. And just like Brian and I, I hope they live happily, and unhappily, ever after. Because the only thing that sucks worse than being married, is not being married.