Marriage sucks! I have always thought the only thing worse than being married, is not being married.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and there is nothing that makes me happier than being a wife. But marriage is hard. It is compromise and cooperation and sacrificing for the greater good. Maybe I was single to long and had too many years when the best date was an evening alone.
My husband is making me crazy. He doesn’t know how to not be employed and I don’t know how to get anything done with him home. You would think with both of us at home we would be able to get twice as much done, but the opposite seems to be true. This is especially frustrating as I work from home and this is my busy time.
The fall conference is coming up and I have a million details to take care of, name tags, sponsors, and one last check with the speakers. Not to mention I have a kitchen full of tomatoes waiting to be canned. Of course there is always the usual vacuum, pick up, mop the floor.
Don’t get me wrong, it is so nice to share my morning coffee with my best friend. Not only is the conversation better then with the cats, but he knows just how I like my toes snuggled. But when snuggle time is over, he doesn’t know what to do with himself and I don’t know where to start.
I think that dating is a horrible way to choose a spouse. What does going to dinner and a movie, or bowling, or the opera have to do with being married? It is easy to find someone you want to have fun with, what is hard is finding someone you want to work with. Finding someone you want to go through the good times with is so much easier than finding someone you want to go through the bad times with. I once read that the decision to spend the rest of your life with someone should rest on one question- is this someone I want next to me when my mother dies? I don’t know if I agree with the specifics but the sentiment is right.
My sister will be getting married soon. Sometimes I get to know these things. After years as a single parent she is finally ready for the love of her life. I know that when the thrill of new love has past, and the arguments over toothpaste brands and hard or soft tacos have been settled, she will know what I do- that marriage sucks. And just like Brian and I, I hope they live happily, and unhappily, ever after. Because the only thing that sucks worse than being married, is not being married.
4 comments:
Oh Myndie, I love how you put that. It's so true!! From my limited experience, since we haven't been married very long, Marriage is wonderful, but there are definitely days when it is hard and you really have to work at it. I think when we make it through the not so great days though it gives our marriage that much more strength and substance to it. Hopefully you'll learn how to work together while Brian is looking for a job. I bet it shakes up what you've come to expect from day to day though. Isn't it great that we love these wonderful men of ours. Good Luck!
Transitions are hard! Specially ones you didn't expect! We get so used to our routines and then when they are thrown out the window it's stressful!
I didn't know Brian's sister is getting married?! How exciting!
It's so true that marriage can be hard sometimes. You just have a funny way of putting it. I remember those days when Al didn't have work, and he didn't know what to do with himself. Then when he went back to work I missed him. I got so used to having him around. That's life. Congrats to your sister in law. That is exciting. When you said your sister I was quickly trying to think of what or who you were talking about. Melodee is the only sister I know that isn't married. I was confused,but then read on and understood who you were talking about. Made me laugh.
This post reminds me of the '80s song "Love Stinks" I don't know why but I could hear Adam Sandler from "The Wedding Singer" singing as I read. Good luck with the transition and the fall conference!
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